Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Desert Heat

Today's devotional was called, Walking with Jesus: From the Jordan River into the Desert. The scripture was Mark 1:12-13. I read it out of the message Bible and the title of this passage was call "the test". I also say that if God is giving you a test and you don't pass it, that you will keep taking the same test over and over again. I'm so tired of this test, I want to make an A+ so that I can move on to the next level with God. How about you?

Speaking of tests, the grade I would have received yesterday would have been a D. At 10 p.m. last night I looked at my step counter and saw I had not made my goal. My soul was telling be to go walk on the treadmill but physically I was done. I am not going to beat myself up for not making my steps. I just have to come up with a better plan. As much as I don't like getting up early, I think that it would be a better plan for me to do that and get in my 2000 steps before I actually start my day. I never know what my day is going to bring and I really didn't like how it made me feel last night knowing that I didn't get my steps in. If I make the sacrifice and get up earlier, even just a half hour, then I won't have to think about it for the rest of the day. That's my plan......

Okay back to the meditation: Desert Heat. It talked about how the temptations provide a window for us to see the intense soul-searching, inner struggles of identify formation, surrender and commitment to God's will with which Jesus wrestled. For me, I have wrestled with being unhealthy for years. I read once that it takes a month or so to form a new habit so is these next 40 days gong to be my wilderness journey? The temptations that Jesus was faced with apply to us also. The "evil one" wanted Jesus to change stones into bread (focusing on physical need), gaining easy dominion over the world (focusing on ego-power need) and testing God (focusing on spiritual need). I too need to focus on my physical need by every time I want to eat asking myself if I'm really hungry or am I wanting to feed a deeper need and do I want just to stay in my warm bed or get up and get "stepping"? The ego-power need is one that I don't struggle with because I am way more comfortable being "behind the scenes". My spiritual need takes time and planning and there are someday where I struggle with this. So these next 40 days and nights will probably be a place that will be extremely hot, with a lack of water, and few places of shelter for me. A time when I will wrestle with physical, spiritual and emotional trials because the "evil one" doesn't want me to get out of this vicious cycle that I find myself in. I to must use scripture to get through and when I do, God will send angels to attended to me......

Keep walking....God didn't say this was going to be easy!!!

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